What Do You Live For?

Merry Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all my readers!

And of course, last day of the year always makes you think about things you forget to even think about during the year… well today’s the day to be more thankful!

As I was reading Rediscover Catholicism by Matthew Kelly (I think it is God’s message for me today too), I came across the question, “What are you willing to give your life for?” It’s no longer what you are willing to die for, because we have multiple stories of martyrdom and in our society (where we live), no one is asking you to die for anything, but to live for something. We get so caught up with our life, emotions, plans, and building relationships with people around us that we forget to ask ourselves about our life, plans, relationship with God this year. How was it?

I gave up social media (IG, Twitter, sc, etc.) this year; it definitely was a difficult process the first couple months, but as the time went on, it became easier. There were definitely moments when I wanted to share my experiences through social media but I could not. I felt like I was cut off from the world because I seem to have no knowledge of what was happening with my friends that I don’t really see or talk to in a regular basis, I would find out through other people and it bothered me. This year definitely made me realize that if you want to maintain relationships, it is not enough to depend on social media to know what is happening, but for you to actually reach out to them. There were real relationships that flourished this year and relationships that I still need to work on and have realized my shortcomings. I pray that this year, I may have the courage to care more and delve into relationships that actually matter to me.

There were also a lot of “firsts” for me this year, and also realizations about myself that I have not even imagined existed. It was a blessed year in terms of travelling for me as I visited a lot of places. Those are the moments I wished I could share with everyone but I knew I could not share everything with everyone. Why and who did I want to share my life and experiences with was the question that popped in my head. For what was my reason for sharing? Visiting a lot of places this year put different perspectives in my head and heart. Where would I be three years from now? Would I still be where I am at? I pray that this year, I follow and find God wherever He is.

There were definitely a lot of questions that was asked this year as well, as per my questions that are already listed above. However, thinking about these questions or even thinking about the answers to those questions I realized that I may not always like the answer or the outcome. I may not like where God is leading me at the moment, but I have to think about the bigger picture (always think about the bigger picture). We may only see a fragment of the piece but God sees it all. I pray that this year, I may learn to trust more.

But really… how was my relationship with God this year? As usual, my answer is the same. It has been a wave of ups and downs. I struggle to maintain it. I struggle to pursue it. I just struggle. However, God never fails, He uses the people around me, my surroundings to always lead me back to Him. But I just dislike the fact that my high peaks do not surpass others, in other words, I’ve become stagnant and lazy with my faith. I found excuses this year to stay where I am at, because I like where I am at. I am simply did not grow in my faith. I remained the same. I pray that this year, I may have the strength to persevere with my faith even when things get tough.

So what do I really want to live for this year? I want to find myself again deeply in love with my faith, my family, and with what I do. I want to be able to look at things no longer in my perspective but through God. I want to answer others prayers. Matthew Kelly said in his book, “A lot of prayers go unanswered because we forget to heed the call.” I want to answer His call and I will start with myself again. It will be a struggle as always, but I want to look back through the year and say, “Hey, I actually grew in my faith this year.”

Blessings in the coming year 2018! I pray you will have more blessings with lots of hope, faith, and love.



Fiat – Day 19

“In the end, life contains only one tragedy: not to have been a saint.”

When we hear the word “saint,” all good, desiring human qualities pop up in our minds.

Every saint lived different lives, but they all have one thing in common: they kept their “yes” to the Lord. Their faith became their stronghold and their “fiat” became their life. Everytime I read or hear saint stories, I always muttered to myself, “they make it seem so easy”. I realized that they’re humans and experienced the same things we experienced, the only difference is their submission and full trust in God.

May we learn to willingly submit to Your will.

I choose You. – Day 18

I was left confused as I sat and listened in the pews after the gospel reading of yesterday’s Vigil for Protection of Human Life. The words from the gospel of John, “You did not choose me, I chose you…” kept repeating in my head. I have heard this gospel reading several times, but a thought popped in my head as the deacon read those words. It prompted me to question what Jesus meant when He said it.

“You did not choose me…”

Of course, I did. I chose this life. I chose You. Why would I do all these if I did not choose You? Tell me how I did it without choosing You.

“…I chose You.”

Why did you choose me? How can you choose me? Tell me how You can choose someone like me?

Most of the time when we feel like this, it’s when we question what God is doing in our lives. Because honestly at some point of our lives, we will ask those questions. Why me?

We may feel unworthy and a failure at times but at that point in our life we can choose God. We don’t have to wait for Him to choose us (of course He always chooses us), we must realize that we need Him.

Lord, give me more strength to face life’s difficulties.

Everything happens for a reason? – Day 17

They say, “Life is like a rosary, full of mysteries.” Why? There are some things in life that unexpectedly happen. It might be things we’d like or not like to happen, but they happen. I always remember St. Francis when things I don’t like happen or upset me. “Lord grant me the grace to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, the wisdom to know the difference.”

Whatever you may be going through… always remember that you have a God just waiting for you to come home.

May we find peace.

Something Beautiful – Day 16

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, ’cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I’m in reach
‘Cause I am down on my knees, I’m waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

I’ve always imagined this song to be the song for my wedding video. Imagine… as the church doors open and as I walk to the altar to meet my groom, smiling at all the other people staring at me, trying to contain the tears that is starting to well up in my eyes, and I imagine… something beautiful. This is something beautiful.

But since I am not even close to being married, the something beautiful I imagine is the birth of Jesus. Imagine… being with Mary and Joseph at the time Jesus was born, isn’t it beautiful? I can hear the angels singing “Gloria”. I can smell the winter air inside the little stable. It feels joyful. The image of Jesus’ birth is joyful.

Okay, okay, I must’ve imagined too far ahead and too far back… where am I leading your thoughts to again? Oh yeah.. have you ever longed for something for so long, and when you finally got it, you feel undeniably happy.

I’m always reminded every time I hear this song, that we already have something beautiful in our lives, we just have to be aware of the little blessings we have by being grateful. Be thankful for everything, because everything does not come easy for everyone.

Contrary to what the song is saying… we don’t have to wait for something beautiful to happen. We can make something beautiful to happen by just being thankful. Being loving. Being joyful.

May our Christmas be filled with more love and joy.

We are called to be missionaries. – Day 15

Contrary to what most people think, I believe we are called to be full-time missionaries. How do you see yourselves three years from now?

Being a missionary for the Lord is summed up by the homily I heard yesterday that quoted the following:

Only tell people about Jesus when you are asked. However, live your life so other people will ask about Jesus.

As we approach Christmas, we have to be reminded about the reason for the season. We can easily be distracted by material preparation, but how about our hearts? Are we ready to be a missionary for Jesus like John who testified to the light?

May we be filled with joy and spread thay joy to others.

Haven’t we had enough? – Day 14

“For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.” || Romans 3:23

Everyday, everywhere there have been multiple accounts of desperate call for help, whether it be through a child being sexually abused, through a mother’s decision to abort her offspring, a father’s dilemma of providing for his family, through the problem of world hunger, political and economic problems of the world… it just would not stop. I (sadly, most of the time) feel hopeless in this world.

The world has gone cold… not only literally because its winter, but cold-cold. It brings me back to a reflection when St. Paul wishes and longs to be brought “out” of this world. To be with God the Father and end the suffering. However, he continues on to say that his purpose to be presently in the world serves the people of God. I simply cannot. Sometimes it’s so easy for me to condemn people of the wrong things they do, and point it out like it is the front page headline in the newspaper. Why? Why are the news always about pointing out all the bad things in the world? Or sometimes reading comments from a video / post can also be disheartening.

Where is the love? Where is the hope?

I hope and pray for peace in the world. For Peace in Christ, because honestly I’ve had enough.

May we create change through ourselves this season.